…..my younger self would have said a few years ago! All those mums I hadn’t seen for 9 weeks, I’d have to be slimmer, I’d have to walk around the corner and everyone says ‘oh wow Rachel, you’ve lost weight!’
Isn’t it funny how us women feel the need to put ourselves on diets for ‘special’ occasions? I used to diet for upcoming weddings, christenings, parties & celebrations all because I wanted people to see me slimmer…. or was it really so that I could feel better about who I was (or so I believed)
I was inspired to write this blog today as I recently saw a post of a facebook group I’m in and someone had asked for diet tips for her upcoming wedding, she only had a few months and was desperate to be slim for the big day. My initial reaction was frustration/anger (before I remembered that the majority of women don’t approach weight/eating like I do) and then it was replaced with sadness….. Why did this woman (whose profile pic was beautiful by the way) feel the need to squash her body into a smaller dress, starve herself to reduce the side of her thighs or stomach, to change the body which her fiancé clearly loves or they wouldn’t be getting married? And then that was replaced by shock and disbelief at the advice being given…
‘Here’s a link to a detox, you can lose 10kg in a few weeks’
‘Try this diet, you cut out all carbs/sugars and just eat small and often and your weight should come down in no time’
‘Get yourself a PT and work out like a crazy women, that should do the trick!’
‘I stopped eating for a few weeks before my wedding and it worked a treat!’ (I kid you not this was a genuine comment….)
I’m guilty of having done the same in the past. I remember dieting for my own wedding back in 2007 and being so upset with myself that I wasn’t the weight I wanted to be on the big day (even though I have THE BEST day ever!) and then what happened……?
The 2 week honeymoon which followed snowboarding in the Rocky Mountains (awesome!) turned into a food fest as I unleashed all of that deprivation from the previous months of dieting that I went crazy and came home not only with a new snowboard but also close to 5kg of extra weight (I cringe at the thought now at my lack of control)
There is such a social stigma to perfection on wedding days, lying on beaches, taking your children to school after the summer holidays and the other mums are like ‘wow you’ve lost weight!’. WHY…?? Who decided that slimness is the definition of perfection? It’s how all brides should look? It’s how all women in bikinis enjoying their holidays should be? It’s how all mum’s on the school run should be?
Not in my world. I’m guessing not in your world either.
So what can we do about it? It starts with each one of us. It starts with us trying to accept our lumps and bumps when we get dressed in the mornings. It starts with us not passing comment on our bodies or anyone else’s for that matter (I posted about this on my face page this week here)
I now help women feel empowered with who they are (regardless of their size), embrace their female bodies, lumps, bumps and cellulite included. It’s the only way to move forward if you are fed up of being on the diet treadmill and suffering the crushing blows of failure when you fall off (it also does nothing for your self worth or self esteem by the way, I learnt that the hard way)
As the new school year approaches (hooray….9 weeks with my little munchkins has been very testing at times!) I invite you to think how you wish to start this new term? How do you want to feel? What do you want to achieve? What do you want to change? (remember none of your answers are actually related to your weight even if you think they might be….) Write your comments below, I’d love to know more